Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Bad Comedy

I forgot I had one of these...but now I actually have something to write about.

I went to an open mic night tonight at a comedy club in the lovely town of West Palm Beach. It was all guys. It was all horrible horrible comedy, mainly about masturbation (minus the friend I went to see who was delightful, witty, and not at all vulgar). This was probably because none of the guys who I saw tonight have actually had sex with a real live woman--they were gross, homophobic, and sexist. Not witty, not delightful, not shockingly funny. Just gross. Extremely gross.
I generally try not to be a "man-hater" but tonight I felt overwhelmingly thankful that I have no natural inclinations to date men.
What was even more shocking however was that people were actually laughing. Apparently gay-bashing jokes are hysterical. The same guy who spent five minutes crudely making fun of gay men (including an AIDS joke...WTF?!???!? I hate people) later hit on me with this classic line..."Yea I like that plaid dress...can I have a picnic on you?" Exact words.
He was also three inches shorter than me...I'm 5'3".

I've been wanting to try stand-up comedy for a while now but I'm not sure Palm Beach County is my crowd. There were no women, no (out) homos, and no actual funny jokes.
Unless I start doing jokes about banging strippers, creating a remote control for "my woman", and not wanting to get in a fight with a gay guy because I might get AIDS, I might as well not try to make the average Palm Beach Improv Open Mic Night attendee laugh.